Confessions of a Comic Book Guy is a weekly column by Steve Bennett of Super-Fly Comics and Games in Yellow Springs, Ohio.  This week, Bennett talks about what retailers can control in a bad economy, and the return of Roy Rogers:

I don't intend to be negative when I write these things but when I see dots I connect 'em, that's just the kind of cowboy I am.  Of course those dots have got to be numbered otherwise you'll end up with a squiggle instead of a picture of a giraffe.  I have noticed how it always seems easy for people to 'discover' evidence which just coincidentally happens to support their assumptions.  So with that in mind this week's confession comes in the form of an affirmation; I don't believe in the worst case scenario.  There's always something you can do, even in a year as bad for retail in America as this one.

We can't control when comic book downloads become ubiquitous but there is one we can control; our shops.  Now most of this will definitely fall into the category of "tell me something I don't know", but it is worth repeating every once in a while.  Every day you have to focus on the fundamentals that make going to a comic book shop an experience instead of just another errand.  Cleanliness, customer service, special orders and of course a genuine enthusiasm for what you're selling.

You also have to sell something other than comics; it's something Mary Alice Wilson of Dark Star Books drilled into my head when I worked there years ago and it's still true.  Diamond's Previews catalog is jam packed with ancillary crap, junk and stuff that range from impulse purchases to major investments.  It's definitely a good resource and you should be using it to find merchandise that complements your store and clientele.

In the past I've warned you can get in trouble when you wander too far from our 'core menu' of comics, and you'd think that in troubled times like these that would be doubly true but not always.  McDonalds saw now as the perfect time to start selling discount "fancy" coffee drinks to a middle American indifferent to "coffee culture;" and so far they seem to be making a success of it.

And in times like these you probably shouldn't be allowing 100% of your livelihood to rest on any one product, publisher or distributor (especially when so often they take us for granted).  These times call for diversification, having different product lines and revenue streams that won't alienate your core customer base.  So if you're not selling candy, gum or magazines, you might want to ask yourself, why not?

Don't worry, I won't be backsliding and again write about one of my favorite subjects, i.e. "everything comes back" (though let the record show I actually refrained from mentioning they were trying to turn Bazooka Joe, Where's Waldo and Stretch Armstrong into movie franchises).  But I've just got to mention the Roy Rogers revival, especially since it won't be a bio picture or traditional Western but rather (and I quote) a "fantasy family film."  Meaning, what, Roy will be going after Elvin cattle rustlers?

It's a cheap, easy joke but what the press release probably means is that any film starring the fictional Roy Rogers, a proponent of such antique notions as fair play and good citizenship, is by its nature a fantasy.  A couple of paragraphs ago I called myself a cowboy but must confess I was never the biggest fan of Westerns growing up, whether in movie, TV or comic book form.  As a fat kid I couldn't work up a whole lot of wish fulfillment for heroic characters that were basically good at gym and made camping out a lifestyle.  But I do have enough affection for the character that I hope the producers do right by him.

Hopefully they'll take the Pleasantville approach and send modern characters into his world (the reverse being too horrible for me to contemplate) and being forced to live by The Cowboy Code.*  But I've got to wonder if you can sell that kind of wholesomeness outside of a very narrow niche, even ironically.

I've mentioned Wizards of Mickey several times in these columns as well as the fact  Disney Inc. has plans to raise The Mouse's profile, so I have a vested interest in seeing the card game made available here.  But of course I'm more interested in seeing the Italian comic book series translated; Boom! Studios, the ball's in your court (though if they to make their first Mickey Mouse comic an original Kingdom Hearts series I wouldn't cry).

* Either of the parents from Jon & Kate Plus 8 would do nicely but if I had to choose a single fictional character it would be teenage sociopathic douche bag supreme Chuck Bass from the TV series Gossip Girls.  He could benefit more from a summer working on Roy Rogers' ranch than anyone I can think of.

The opinions expressed in this column are solely those of the writer, and do not necessarily reflect the views of the editorial staff of ICv2.com.