I Think I Can Manage is a weekly column by retailer Steven Bates, who manages Bookery Fantasy, a million dollar retail operation in Fairborn, Ohio. This week Bates got febrile from exposure to Star Wars, and dreamed up a whole new range of Star Wars games.
Like most of America, and perhaps the world, I've recently been caught up in 'Star Wars fever,' the result of overexposure to George Lucas' final installment in his epic space fantasy series. In its first two weeks, Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith has racked up stellar ticket sales and appears to be on course for busting many box office records. Merchandise for the film, though more subdued than the ancillaries for the prior two movies, is nearly everywhere. Action figures, books, comics, clothing, posters, toys, replicas, standees, jewelry, M&M's, you name it, it's out there. You can't even walk into a Burger King without seeing Darth Vader's angular mug staring back at you.
Star Wars, with classic themes of good vs. evil, flashy fight sequences, exhilarating space battles, an endless supply of eye candy aliens, and exotic locales like Endor, Tatooine, Hoth, and Naboo, provides the perfect platform for imaginative play, and some of the most impressive Star Wars items are the numerous games available. Aimed at fans from four to 40 to 104, licensors over the years have cornered nearly every market, offering everything from board games to video games, miniature battle games to starship combat games, RPGs and CCGs to LARPs. Game manufacturers have even updated old favorites like Life, Risk, Monopoly, Stratego, Battleship, and even Trivial Pursuit, all tweaked to reflect events happening long, long ago in a galaxy far, far away.
But what games have they overlooked? I mean, there are hundreds of exciting, fun, and challenging games out there waiting for the Star Wars treatment. I've listed a few ideas below, based on some ideas bandied about at the shop by my staff and customers. Of course, all names and concepts are copyright and trademark Lucasfilm Ltd., so don't come knocking on my door if you want to actually manufacture any of these (but I will take a free play-test copy). Be forewarned! There may be spoilers to Episode Three herein!
Star Wars Operation
The classic electronic game reborn! As a 'Droid surgeon' your job is to rebuild the battered and burned body of Anakin Skywalker, transforming him into the Dark Lord of the Sith, Darth Vader. Be careful with those hydraulic forceps! You don't want to hear Anakin scream in agony if you accidentally touch the stumps of his severed legs and arm, or tear at his charred flesh. If you successfully reconstruct Anakin into Vader, you activate a respirator that rasps out 'Oooom, Puhhhh. Oooom, Puhhhh. Oooom, Puhhhh'
Star Wars Clue
Padme Amidala is dead. Who killed her? Was it General Obi Wan on Mustafar with a lightsaber? Or Greedo on Tatooine with a blaster? Round up all the usual suspects, including Emperor Plumpatine and See-Three-Peacock before someone else is killed.
Star Wars Barrel of Ewoks
You'll surely smile and likely laugh as you string together a chain of furry little friends--but watch out for those speeder bikes! Yo-mamma!
Star Wars Jenga Fett
Take a tall stack of identical pieces of body armor, slowly removing one piece at a time. Stay cool -- you wouldn't want to lose your head!
Star Wars Hungry Hungry Jabba
Four sluggish Hutts surround an arena filled with frog-like gorgs, in a truly tasteless display of grotesque gourmet gorging. Kids learn not only good hand and eye coordination, they pick up tips on etiquette and nutrition, as well.
Star Wars Tip It
Luke Skywalker dangles from a weather vane high above Bespin. Can you safely remove all the Twin Pod Cloud Cars from their Cloud City docking bays without sending Luke plummeting to certain death?
Star Wars Don't Break the Carbonite
Hammer away at those frozen blocks, trying to free your old buddy, Han Solo. But one wrong strike and Han'll be shattered into more pieces than the hairs on a Wookiee's backside.
Star Wars Pin the Tail on the Bantha
Comes with a four tails and a Bantha body. Kids will have hours of fun just trying to figure out which end is the tail end!
Star Wars Scrabble
Those are just a handful of outrageous (and not so far-fetched) ideas -- we'd love to hear yours! E-mail your suggestions for overlooked potential Star Wars games to ICv2.com today.
